I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I don't think brook has ever known best
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize