Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
