She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
