Your mouth is God's brothel.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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