I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
