We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
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