Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
