I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
