I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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