Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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