Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
