Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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