are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
