She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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