it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
It's never too late to be topless.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
