I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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