You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Yo dont text me then not text me
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
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