Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize