does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
