Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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