She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
