I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
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