sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
