Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Randomize
