it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
