Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
