Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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