dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
