Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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