Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
