i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
tequila makes me forget i have legs
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
