just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
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