I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
The adults are the big ones right?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
