Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
high people should be assigned attendants
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize