Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Randomize
