I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
