roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Randomize
