and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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