well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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