Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize