I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Randomize