My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize