Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
