You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
