bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
