Im at strip club and am horny
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
