We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize