I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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