therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize