C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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