can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize